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Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter



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  #61  
Old December 8th, 2007, 1:48 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your version of Harry Potter

I've written a bit more of CoS, because I got tired of PS:    


  INT. FIRST FLOOR (OUTSIDE FILCH’S OFFICE) - HOGWARTS - LATE AFTERNOON

Nearly-Headless Nick comes gliding out through a wall as Harry comes in.

NEARLY HEADLESS NICK
Harry! Harry! Did it work?

Harry notices a large black cabinet destroyed, dropped from great height.

NEARLY HEADLESS NICK (CONT’D)
I persuaded Peeves to crash it right over Filch's office.

HARRY POTTER
Was that you? Thanks, Nick!

Nick looks back at his rejection letter. Harry notices.

HARRY POTTER (CONT’D)
I wish there was something I could do for you about the Headless Hunt.

Nick suddenly stops gliding and Harry walks right through him.

NEARLY HEADLESS NICK
But there is something you could do for me...

INT. GRYFFINDOR COMMON ROOM - EVENING

Harry breaks the news to Ron, who is doing potions homework, and Hermione.

HERMIONE GRANGER
A deathday party? I bet there aren't many living people who can say they've been to one of those - it'll be fascinating!

RON WEASLEY
Why would anyone want to celebrate the day they died? Sounds dead depressing to me...

Harry looks out the window to see Hagrid carving pumkins twice the size of himself. Hermione notices this.

HERMIONE GRANGER
A promise is a promise. You said you'd go to the deathday party.

INT. GREAT HALL - HOGWARTS - EVENING
(31/10/92)

Bats fly by and candles and the enormous pumpkin lanterns float over the packed tables.

INT. ENTRANCE HALL - HOGWARTS - EVENING
(31/10/92)

Students make their way inside, yet Harry, Ron and Hermione head towards the dungeon. Snape eyes them suspiciuosly
  



I wanted to finish this before I posted, But I ran out of time... Ah, I love the fact that DH is out:    


  For the last time, the camera pans and fades to…

INT. POTIONS DUNGEON

…pickled animals in jars on shelves. We find Severus Snape taking the roll. He pauses and looks at Harry

SEVERUS SNAPE
Ah. Yes. Harry Potter. Our new - celebrity

Snape continues to take the roll, occasionally his cold, empty black eyes look straight at Harry.

CUT TO:
LATER

Snape stands in front of the class.

SEVERUS SNAPE (CONT’D)
You are here to learn the subtle science and exact art of potionmaking. I don't expect you will really understand the beauty of the softly simmering cauldron with its shimmering fumes, the delicate power of liquids that creep through human veins, bewitching the mind, ensnaring the senses.
(pause)
I can teach you how to bottle fame, brew glory, even stopper death - if you aren't as big a lot of dunderheads as I usually have to teach.


Stuff


CUT TO:

INT. HEADMASTER’S OFFICE - HOGWARTS - AFTERNOON

Snape storms around the room.

SEVERUS SNAPE
- mediocre ... arrogant as his father, a determined rule-breaker ... delighted to find himself famous ... attention-seeking and impertinent -
Dumbledore is sitting at his desk reading ‘Transfiguration Today’, not even noticing Snape break a few of the odd instruments which lie on nearby tables.

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE
You see what you expect to see, Severus. Other teachers report that the boy is modest, likable, and reasonably talented.

Snape looks angered at this.
  



From DH thread:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blast_ended View Post
I have written my own DH script in a professional program (Final Draft). I though about it a lot and I would really love to hear any sort of feedback. So far I've got to Ron's leaving. It is in PDF format over here.

Main changes so far include:

Replacing Yaxley with Bellatrix
Shortening the Dursely's very much
Replacing Bill and Fleur with Remus and Tonks (Also Bill and Fleur does have cameo's in the chase because I needed 13 people and couldn't think of anyone else).
Cutting the ministry break in.
Having Lupin deliever the news about the taboo.
Moving the kiss to the Wedding.
Cutting Krum, Muriel and Xenophilious.

So far it is 50 pages, which is about 50 minutes - Seems fine to me, as I've covered everything until the 16th chapter.

Enjoy and please give me feedback!
I took a quick look through what you'd added since you last posted here and I hardly noticed the Ministry was missing and I liked how the tent scenes were handled.

I should post my script in PDF, too. I gets annoying formatting it (centering dialogue and having spaces in between).

Edit: I found a way of doing that here is my PS script (first 4 and a half chapters and a bit of chapter 8, clocking in at the moment at 42 pages) [Link no longer valid]



Last edited by ArryGrotter; December 17th, 2007 at 9:01 pm.
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  #62  
Old December 11th, 2007, 8:55 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

As part of my PS break I decided to do a chunk of GoF, only to figure out that it is twice too long. Oh, well, I'm not onto that yet, but what I have done (Now edited to include everything I've done.):    


  
GoF: The Triwizard Tournament, Mad-Eye Moody, The Unforgivable CursesINT. GREAT HALL - HOGWARTS - EVENING
(1/9/1994)

Dumbledore gets to his feet.

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE
I have only two words to say to you: Tuck in.

RON WEASLEY
About time.

Ron, Harry and Hermione start to eat, while Nearly Headless Nick onlooks.

NEARLY HEADLESS NICK
You're lucky there's a feast at all tonight, you know. There was trouble in the kitchens earlier.

RON WEASLEY
(Still eating)
Why? What happened?

NEARLY HEADLESS NICK
Peeves, of course. He wanted to attend the feast, but that’s out of the question.

RON WEASLEY
So what did he do in the kitchens?

NEARLY HEADLESS NICK
The usual. Wreaked havoc and mayhem. Pots and pans everywhere. Terrified the house-elves -

CLANG. Hermione knocks over her goblet of pumpkin juice in shock.

HERMIONE GRANGER
There are house-elves here? Here at Hogwarts?

NEARLY HEADLESS NICK
Certainly. The largest number in any dwelling in Britain, I believe. Over a hundred.

HERMIONE GRANGER
But they get paid? They get holidays, don't they? And - and sick leave, and pensions, and everything?

NEARLY HEADLESS NICK
(Shaking his head)
House-elves don't want sick leave and pensions!

Hermione puts down her knife and fork.

HERMIONE GRANGER
Slave-labour.

LATER

Puddings are now being served, but still Hermione does not eat.

RON WEASLEY
(Pushing it towards her)
Treacle tart, Hermione!

But Hermione, with her arms folded, turns to face the staff table where Dumbledore is standing. The puddings vanish.

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE
Now that we are all fed and watered.

HERMIONE GRANGER
Hmph!

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE
I ask for your attention, while I give out a few notices. Mr. Filch, the caretaker, has asked me to tell you that the list of objects forbidden inside the castle has this year been extended to comprises of some four hundred and thirty-seven items. It can be viewed in Mr. Filch's office, if anybody would like to check it.

Dumbledore smiles slightly.

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE (CONT’D)
It is also my painful duty to inform you that the Inter-House Quidditch Cup will not take place this year. This is due to an event that will be starting in October. I have great pleasure in announcing that this year at Hogwarts -

But the Great Hall doors open. A RUMBLE of thunder is heard. A hooded man stands at the open doors. It is MAD-EYE MOODY.

Moody lowers his hood to reveal a long mane of grizzled, dark gray hair and a face looking as though it was carved out of wood. A chunk of Moody’s nose is missing. His eyes are mis-matched. One, the dark one, is normal looking and is facing the staff table and the other, which is electric blue, is whizzing around in its socket, glancing at all the students.

Moody walks up to Dumbledore with CLUNKS. They shake hands. Dumbledore gestures him to sit down. Moody does, and sniffs the plate of sausages in front of him [Only the food on the Student tables disappear] and brings out a knife and fork to eat it with, rather than those surrounding him.

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE (CONT’D)
May I introduce our new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher? Professor Moody.

No one claps except for Dumbledore and Hagrid.

HARRY POTTER
(To Ron)
Moody? Mad-Eye Moody? The one your dad went to help this morning?

RON WEASLEY
Must be.

HERMIONE GRANGER
What happened to him? What happened to his face?

RON WEASLEY
Dunno.

Up at the staff table, Moody pulls out a hip flask, ignoring the pumpkin juice. Harry notices Moody has a wooden leg.

Dumbledore clears his throat.

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE
As I was saying, we are to have the honour of hosting a very exciting event that has not been held for over a century. It is my very great pleasure to inform you that the Triwizard Tournament will be taking place at Hogwarts this year.

FRED WEASLEY
You’re joking!

The tension created by Moody’s arrival leaves and Dumbledore chuckles.

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE
I am not joking, Mr. Weasley. Though now that you mention it, I did hear an excellent one over the summer-

McGonagall clears her throat

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE (CONT’D)
But maybe this is not the time... Ah yes, the Triwizard Tournament was first established some seven hundred years ago as a friendly competition between the three largest European schools of wizardry: Hogwarts, Beauxbatons, and Durmstrang. A champion was selected to represent each school, and the three champions competed in three magical tasks. The schools took it in turns to host the tournament once every five years, and it was a most excellent way of establishing ties between young witches and wizards of different nationalities - until, that is, the death toll mounted so high that the tournament was discontinued.

Hermione looks shocked

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE (CONT’D)
Our own departments of International Magical Cooperation and Magical Games and Sports have decided the time is ripe for another attempt to reinstate the tournament. We have worked hard over the summer to ensure that this time, no champion will find himself or herself in mortal danger. The heads of Beauxbatons and Durmstrang will be arriving with their short-listed contenders in October, and the selection of the three champions will take place at Halloween. An impartial judge will decide which students are most worthy to compete for the Triwizard Cup, the glory of their school, and a thousand Galleons personal prize money.

Fred and George Weasley’s faces light up.

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE (CONT’D)
The heads of the participating schools, along with the Ministry of Magic, have agreed to impose an age restriction on contenders this year, and only students who are of age - that is to say, seventeen years or older - will be allowed to put forward their names. I will personally be ensuring that no underage student hoodwinks our impartial judge into making them Hogwarts champion. I therefore beg you not to waste your time submitting yourself if you are under seventeen.

Dumbledore eyes Fred and George.

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE (CONT’D)
I know that you will all extend every courtesy to our foreign guests while they are with us, and will give your whole-hearted support to the Hogwarts champion when he or she is selected. And now, it is late, and I know how important it is to you all to be alert and rested as you enter your lessons tomorrow morning. Bedtime! Chop chop!

The students leave and we follow Harry, Ron, Hermione, Fred and George.

GEORGE WEASLEY
(Glaring at the staff table)
They can't do that! We're seventeen in April, why can't we have a shot?

FRED WEASLEY
(Also glaring at the staff table)
They're not stopping me entering. The champions'll get to do all sorts of stuff you'd never be allowed to do normally. And a thousand Galleons prize money!

RON WEASLEY
Yeah, a thousand Galleons...

HARRY POTTER
Who's this impartial judge who's going to decide who the champions are?

FRED WEASLEY
Dunno, but it's them we'll have to fool. I reckon a couple of drops of Aging Potion might do it, George.

RON WEASLEY
Dumbledore knows you're not of age, though.

FRED WEASLEY
Yeah, but he's not the one who decides who the champion is, is he? Sounds to me like once this judge knows who wants to enter, he'll choose the best from each school and never mind how old they are. Dumbledore's trying to stop us giving our names.

HERMIONE GRANGER
People have died, though!

FRED WEASLEY
Yeah, but that was years ago, wasn't it? Anyway, where's the fun without a bit of risk? Hey, Ron, what if we find out how to get 'round Dumbledore? Fancy entering?

RON WEASLEY
What d'you reckon? Be cool to enter, wouldn't it?

INT. GRYFFINDOR BOYS DORMITORY - HOGWARTS - MIDNIGHT
(1-2/9/94)

Harry is sleeping, his sleep full with dreams:

INT. GREAT HALL - HOGWARTS - EVENING
(DREAM)

An IMPARTIAL JUDGE makes his decision.

IMPARTIAL JUDGE
Harry Potter!

EXT. HOGWARTS GROUNDS - DAY
(DREAM)

Harry raises his arms in victory to the surrounding stands. From them, Cho Chang’s face stands out, glowing with admiration.

INT. GRYFFINDOR BOYS DORMITORY - HOGWARTS - MIDNIGHT
(1-2/9/94)

Harry smiles.

INT. GREAT HALL - HOGWARTS - MORNING
(2/9/94)

Harry, Ron and Hermione are examining their new timetables.

RON WEASLEY
Today's not bad ... outside all morning.

HARRY POTTER
(Groaning)
Double Divination this afternoon.

HERMIONE GRANGER
You should have given it up like me, shouldn't you?

RON WEASLEY
You're eating again, I notice.

Indeed she is.

HERMIONE GRANGER
I've decided there are better ways of making a stand about elf rights.

RON WEASLEY
Yeah ... and you were hungry.

INT. GREENHOUSE THREE - HERBOLOGY - HOGWARTS - MORNING
(2/9/94)

Professor Sprout shows the fourth-year Gryffindors and the fourth-year Hufflepuffs ugly plants, like vertical thick, black, giant slugs, each with numerous swellings on them.

POMONA SPROUT
Bubotubers. They need squeezing. You will collect the pus -

SEAMUS FINNIGAN
The what?

POMONA SPROUT
Pus, Finnigan, pus. It's extremely valuable, an excellent remedy for the more stubborn forms of acne, bubotuber pus, so don't waste it. Wear your dragon-hide gloves; it can do funny things to the skin when undiluted, bubotuber pus.

Harry, Ron and Hermione start.

EXT. HAGRID’S HUT - LATE MORNING
(2/9/94)

Hagrid stands waiting with Fang, his boarhound. Several open wooden crates lay around him. The Gryffindor fourth-years arrive.

RUBEUS HAGRID
Mornin'! Be'er wait fer the Slytherins, they won' want ter miss this - Blast-Ended Skrewts!

RON WEASLEY
Come again?

Lavender Brown looks over the edge of one the crates.

LAVENDER BROWN
(Jumping backwards)
Eurgh!

Harry looks over the edge of the crate. The Blast-Ended Skrewts look like shell-less lobsters, with too many legs and no apparent head. Sparks fly with in the box every now and then and a Skrewt would fly to the other side of the crate.

RUBEUS HAGRID
On'y jus' hatched, so yeh'll be able ter raise 'em yerselves! Thought we'd make a bit of a project of it!

DRACO MALFOY (O.S.)
And why would we want to raise them?

The Slytherin fourth-years arrive.

DRACO MALFOY (CONT’D)
I mean, what do they do? What is the point of them?

Draco looks into the crate.
DRACO MALFOY (CONT’D)
Who would even want a pet like that?

Hermione steps forward.

HERMIONE GRANGER
Just because they're not very pretty, it doesn't mean they're not useful. Dragon blood's amazingly magical, but you wouldn't exactly want a dragon for a pet, would you?

Harry and Ron look at Hagrid who beams.

RUBEUS HAGRID
Now, yeh'll wan' ter feed 'em on a few diff'rent things - I've never had 'em before, not sure what they'll go fer - I got ant eggs an' frog livers an' a bit o' grass snake - just try 'em out with a bit of each.

SEAMUS FINNIGAN
First pus and now this.

INT. GREAT HALL - HOGWARTS - MIDDAY
(2/9/94)

Harry, Ron and Hermione make their way toward the Gryffindor table.

RON WEASLEY
Well, at least the skrewts are small.

HERMIONE GRANGER
They are now, but once Hagrid's found out what they eat, I expect they'll be six feet long

RON WEASLEY
Well, that won't matter if they turn out to cure seasickness or something, will it?

HERMIONE GRANGER
You know perfectly well I only said that to shut Malfoy up.

Hermione starts to eat at rapid speed.

RON WEASLEY
Er - is this the new stand on elf rights? You're going to make yourself puke instead?

HERMIONE GRANGER
No,
(she eats more)
I just want to get to the library.

RON WEASLEY
What? We haven't even got homework yet!

Hermione finishes and speeds off.

HERMIONE GRANGER
See you at dinner!

Harry and Ron share a glance.

INT. DIVINATION CLASS - HOGWARTS - AFTERNOON
(2/9/94)

Harry and Ron sit around a small circular table, as do fellow fourth-year Gryffindors.

SYBILL TRELAWNEY (O.S.)
Good day.

Professor Sybill Trelawney comes forward out of the shadows, looking mournfully at Harry.

SYBILL TRELAWNEY (CONT’D)
You are preoccupied, my dear. My inner eye sees past your brave face to the troubled soul within. I fear the thing you dread will indeed come to pass ... and perhaps sooner than you think...

Harry looks curiously at Trelawney...

SYBILL TRELAWNEY (CONT’D)
My dears, it is time for us to consider the stars. The movements of the planets and the mysterious portents they reveal...

...and remembers.

FLASHBACK TO:

INT. DIVINATION CLASS - HOGWARTS - LATE AFTERNOON
(--/6/94)

SYBILL TRELAWNEY
The Dark Lord lies alone and friendless, abandoned by his followers. His servant has been chained these twelve years. Tonight, before midnight ... the servant will break free and set out to rejoin his master. The Dark Lord will rise again with his servants aid, greater and more terrible than ever he was. tonight ... before midnight ... the servant ... will set out ... to rejoin ... his master...

BACK TO PRESENT

INT. DIVINATION CLASS - HOGWARTS - AFTERNOON
(2/9/94)

RON WEASLEY
(Muttering)
Harry.

HARRY POTTER
What?

Everyone is looking at him.

SYBILL TRELAWNEY
I was saying that Saturn was surely in a position of power in the heavens at the moment of your birth.

Harry catches Ron’s eyes. He is rolling them.

SYBILL TRELAWNEY (CONT’D)
Your dark hair ... your mean stature ... tragic losses so young in life ... I think I am right in saying, my dear, that you were born in midwinter?

HARRY POTTER
No, I was born in July.

Ron laughs.

SYBILL TRELAWNEY
(Slightly angered)
For homework...

INT. FIRST FLOOR - HOGWARTS - EVENING
(2/9/94)

Harry and Ron make their way to dinner.

RON WEASLEY
Miserable old bat. That'll take all weekend, that will.

Hermione finds them.

HERMIONE GRANGER
Lots of homework? Professor Vector didn't give us any at all!

Ron looks more disgruntled at this.

INT. ENTRANCE HALL - HOGWARTS - EVENING
(CONTINUOS ACTION) (2/9/94)

Harry, Ron and Hermione descend the Marble Staircase.

DRACO MALFOY (O.S.)
Weasley!

Harry, Ron and Hermione turn. Draco stands waiting outside the Dungeons with Crabbe and Goyle.

RON WEASLEY
What?

DRACO MALFOY
Your dad’s in the paper, Weasley.

Draco shows Ron a Daily Prophet with the headline ‘Further mistakes at the Ministry of Magic’ with a picture of Arthur and Molly outside the Burrow.

DRACO MALFOY (CONT’D)
And there’s a picture, Weasley. A picture of your parents outside their house - if you can call it a house! Your mother could do with losing a bit of weight, couldn't she?

Ron shakes with fury.

HARRY POTTER
Get stuffed, Malfoy.

DRACO MALFOY
Oh yeah, you were staying with them this summer, weren't you, Potter? So tell me, is his mother really that porky, or is it just the picture?

HARRY POTTER
You know your mother, Malfoy? That expression she's got, like she's got dung under her nose? Has she always looked like that, or was it just because you were with her?

DRACO MALFOY
Don't you dare insult my mother, Potter.

HARRY POTTER
Keep your fat mouth shut, then.

Harry turns away and...

BANG! A spell barely misses him and turns back to Malfoy, but he’s not there.

MAD-EYE MOODY (O.S.)
Oh no you don't, laddie!

Moody comes limping down the marble staircase, pointing his wand at a pure white ferret.

MAD-EYE MOODY (CONT’D)
I don't like people who attack when their opponent's back's turned! Stinking, cowardly, scummy thing to do...

He makes the ferret fly high into the air, then smash back down to the ground.

MAD-EYE MOODY (CONT’D)
(Continuing to bounce the ferret)
Never - do - that - again!

Professor McGonagall comes down the staircase, her arms full of books.

MINERVA MCGONAGALL
Professor Moody!

Moody turns to see who it is, still bouncing the ferret.

MAD-EYE MOODY
Hello, Professor McGonagall.

MINERVA MCGONAGALL
What - what are you doing?

MAD-EYE MOODY
Teaching.

MINERVA MCGONAGALL
Teach - Moody, is that a student?

MAD-EYE MOODY
Yep.

McGonagall drops the books and whips out her wand. The ferret transforms back into Draco Malfoy.

MINERVA MCGONAGALL
Moody, we never use Transfiguration as a punishment! Surely Professor Dumbledore told you that?

MAD-EYE MOODY
He might've mentioned it, yeah.

MINERVA MCGONAGALL
We give detentions, Moody! Or speak to the offender's Head of House!

MAD-EYE MOODY
I'll do that, then.

He looks at Draco, too scared to speak.

MAD-EYE MOODY (CONT’D)
Now, your Head of House'll be Snape, will it?

DRACO MALFOY
(Quietly)
Yes.

MAD-EYE MOODY
Another old friend.

He picks Draco up and drags him toward the dungeon.

MAD-EYE MOODY (CONT’D)
I've been looking forward to a chat with old Snape.

INT. GREAT HALL - HOGWARTS - EVENING
(2/9/94)

Harry, Ron and Hermione sit down for dinner.

RON WEASLEY
Don’t talk to me.

HERMIONE GRANGER
Why not?

RON WEASLEY
Because I want to fix that in my memory forever. Draco Malfoy, the amazing bouncing ferret.

Harry and Hermione laugh. Harry notices Hermione eating fast again.

HARRY POTTER
Don't tell me you're going back to the library this evening?

HERMIONE GRANGER
Got to. Loads to do.

RON WEASLEY
But you said...

HERMIONE GRANGER
It's not schoolwork.

And with one last bite, she departs.

INT. POTIONS DUNGEON - HOGWARTS - AFTERNOON
(3/9/94)

The fourth-year Gryffindor and fourth-year Slytherins are in Potions. Neville Longbottom’s cauldron melts with a hiss.

SEVERUS SNAPE
Detention Longbottom. I would have thought that by the time you melted your fifth cauldron, you would understand not to melt your sixth.

Snape sweeps around the room.

RON WEASLEY
You know why Snape's in such a foul mood, don't you?

HARRY POTTER
Yeah. Moody.

Harry looks up at Snape, still sweeping around the dungeon.

HARRY POTTER (CONT’D)
I reckon Snape's a bit scared of him, you know.

RON WEASLEY
Imagine if Moody turned Snape into a horned toad, and bounced him all around his dungeon...

INT. FIRST FLOOR - HOGWARTS - AFTERNOON
(5/9/94)

The Gryffindor first-years all line up for Defence Against the Dark Arts, all except Hermione, who rushes towards Harry and Ron.

HERMIONE GRANGER
Been in the -

HARRY POTTER
Library. C'mon, quick, or we won't get decent seats.

INT. DEFENCE AGAINST THE DARK ARTS CLASS - HOGWARTS - AFTERNOON
(5/9/94)

The Gryffindor fourth-years sit patiently waiting for Moody.

I'm going to return to PS now
  




Last edited by ArryGrotter; December 12th, 2007 at 4:19 am.
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  #63  
Old December 12th, 2007, 11:43 pm
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

More of PS:    


  
PS: OllivandersEXT. DIAGON ALLEY - AFTERNOON
(1/8/1991)

Harry and Hagrid walk out of an Apothecary.

RUBEUS HAGRID
(Looking at the Hogwarts list)
Just yer wand left - oh yeah, an' I still haven't got yeh a birthday present.

Harry goes red in the face.

HARRY POTTER
You don’t have to -

CUT TO:

EXT. DIAGON ALLEY - AFTERNOON
(1/8/1991)

Harry and Hagrid exit Eeylops Owl Emporium, Harry stammering thanks as he now holds a cage in which a beautiful snowy owl sleeps.

RUBEUS HAGRID
Don' mention it. Just Ollivanders left now.

To points to a shop ‘Ollivanders: Makers of Fine Wands since 382 B.C’.

INT. OLLIVANDERS WAND SHOP - AFTERNOON
(1/8/1991)

A BELL SOUNDS as Harry enters, Hagrid behind him, who sit down on a wooden chair to small for him. Harry looks around at the thousand of boxes, waiting...

MR OLLIVANER (O.S.)
Good afternoon.

Harry jumps. So does Hagrid. The chair which is on makes a crunching noise. Hagrid quickly gets off it.

Mr Ollivander comes forward, old and pale and with long fingers.

MR OLLIVANER (CONT’D)
I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter. You have your mother's eyes. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wand for charm work. Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wand. Eleven inches. Pliable. Excellent for transfiguration. Well, I say he favored it, but it's really the wand that chooses the wizard.

Mr Ollivander looks to Harry’s scar.

MR OLLIVANER (CONT’D)
I'm sorry to say I sold the wand that did it. Thirteen-and-a-half inches. Yew. Powerful wand, very powerful, and in the wrong hands…

Mr Ollivander backs away and brings out a tape measure.

MR OLLIVANER (CONT’D)
Well, now. Mr Potter, which is your wand arm?

HARRY POTTER
Well, I'm right-handed.

MR OLLIVANER
Hold out your arm.
(Harry does)
That's it.

The measuring tape measures from shoulder to finger, wrist to elbow, shoulder to floor, knee to armpit and round his head. While it does this, Ollivander searches for wands while saying:

MR OLLIVANER (CONT’D)
Every Ollivander wand has a core of a powerful magical substance, Mr Potter. We use unicorn hairs, phoenix tail feathers, and the heartstrings of dragons. No two Ollivander wands are the same, and of course, you will never get such good results with another wizard's wand.

The measuring tape begins to measure around Harry’s nostrils.

MR OLLIVANER (CONT’D)
That will do.

The tape falls to the ground. Mr Ollivander comes out, a wand in his hand, which he passes to Harry.

MR OLLIVANER (CONT’D)
Try this: Beechwood and dragon heartstring. Nine inches. Nice and flexible. Just give it a wave.

Harry, feeling foolish, begins to wave it, but it is snatched out of his hand by Ollivander.

MR OLLIVANER (CONT’D)
No, no - here.
(He passes Harry another wand)
Ebony and unicorn hair, eight and a half inches, springy. Go on, try it out.

One again, it is snatched out of his hand by Ollivander the second Harry tries to wave it, put it next to the other tried wand.

The pile of tried wands mount.

MR OLLIVANER (CONT’D)
Tricky customer, eh? Not to worry, we'll find the perfect match here somewhere.

He looks for another wand, then pauses at his discovery.

MR OLLIVANER (CONT’D)
I wonder, now - yes, why not.
(He gives the wand to Harry)
Unusual combination - holly and phoenix feather, eleven inches, nice and supple.

Harry swishes the wand and out of it comes red and gold sparks. Hagrid claps.

MR OLLIVANER (CONT’D)
Yes, indeed, oh, very good. Well, well, well… how curious… how very curious…

Ollivander takes Harry’s wand and wraps it up.

MR OLLIVANER (CONT’D)
Curious… curious…

HARRY POTTER
Sorry, but what's curious?

Mr Ollivander looks straight at Harry.

MR OLLIVANER
I remember every wand I've ever sold, Mr Potter. It so happens that the phoenix whose tail feather is in your wand, gave another feather - just one other. It is very curious indeed that you should be destined for this wand when its brother why, its brother
(He looks up at Harry’s scar)
gave you that scar.
(He looks back at Harry)
Yes, thirteen-and-a-half inches. Yew. The wand chooses the wizard, remember. I think we must expect great things from you, Mr Potter…. After all, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named did great things - terrible, yes, but great.

EXT. PADDINGTON STATION - LATE AFTERNOON
(1/8/1991)

Harry and Hagrid are eating burgers.

RUBEUS HAGRID
You all right, Harry? Yer very quiet.

Harry doesn’t know what to say, yet:

HARRY POTTER
Everyone thinks I'm special. All those people in the Leaky Cauldron, Professor Quirrell, Mr Ollivander… but I don't know anything about magic at all. How can they expect great things? I'm famous and I can't even remember what I'm famous for. I don't know what happened when Vol-,
(Hagrid flinches)
sorry - I mean, the night my parents died.

RUBEUS HAGRID
Don' you worry, Harry. Everyone starts at the beginning at Hogwarts, you'll be just fine. Just be yerself. I know it's hard. Yeh've been singled out, an' that's always hard. But yeh'll have a great time at Hogwarts - I did - still do, 'smatter of fact.

The train arrives Harry and Hagrid stand up, Hagrid pulling something out of his coat.

RUBEUS HAGRID (CONT’D)
Yer ticket fer Hogwarts. o' September - King's Cross - it's all on yer ticket. Any problems with the Dursleys, send me a letter with yer owl. See yeh soon, Harry.

Harry goes toward the train, turns back, but Hagrid has gone.
  



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  #64  
Old December 14th, 2007, 10:26 pm
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Oh MY ArryGrotter have I been gone away from this thread this long? Wow I have a lot of catching up to do lol. I'll read through some of your scripts and I'll post the next section of my old HBP screenplay. Let me know what you think! Remember I wrote this LONG before the OOTP movie came out so a certain spell that was used in THAT movie is still here..just ignore it

INT. BOYS DORMITORY-THAT NIGHT

The scene fades to a shot of Ron in the bed snoring. The camera then pans to Harry looking in his Advanced Potions book using his wand as a light. We see a shot of what Harry is reading and zooms in on the word ‘Levicorpus (nvbl)’ Harry mouths the words and then sits the book down. He grabs his wand and flicks it and there’s a flash of light. BOOM! We hear Ron screaming and the camera pans to him hanging upside down like there’s a hook holding his leg in midair. Dean and Seamus run over and begin to laugh.

HARRY
Oh..um…sorry Ron. Hang on…I’ll let you down…

He grabs for his book and looks through the pages. He drops the book and points the wand at Ron. There’s a flash of light and Ron falls to his mattress.

HARRY
Sorry.

RON
(In an exhausted voice)
Tomorrow, I’d rather you set the alarm clock.

INT-HOGWARTS-THE GREAT HALL-MORNING

The scene cuts to a shot of Hogwarts and follows an owl through the the Great Hall. The camera then pans down to Harry, Ron, and Hermione at the Gryffindor table.

HERMIONE
So you just decided to try out an unknown, handwritten incantation and see what would happen?

HARRY
Why does it matter if it’s handwritten?

HERMIONE
Because it’s probably not Ministry of Magic approved and also because I’m starting to think this Prince character was a bit dodgy.

RON
It was a laugh Hermione, that’s all. Calm down. You just don’t like the Prince because he’s better than you in Potions…

Hermione
It’s got nothing to do wih that! I just think its very irresponsible to start performing spells when you don’t even know what they’re for! Half Blood Prince, I bet it’s just a stupid nickname, and it doesn’t seem as though he’s a very nice person to me!

Hundreds of Owls start to fly into the Great Hall carrying packages

HARRY
Hermione if he’d been a budding Death Eater he wouldn’t have been boasting about being ‘half-blood’ would he?

HERMIONE
The Death Eaters can’t all be pure blood, and I bet it’s only Muggle-borns they hate, they’d be quite happy to let you and Ron join up!

RON
There’s no way they’d let me be a Death Eater, my whole family are blood traitors! That’s as bad as Muggle-borns to them!

HARRY
And they’d love to have me, we’d be best pals if they didn’t keep trying to do me in.

Hedwig lands a large package in front of Harry. Harry opens the pack and it’s a new copy of the Advanced Potion Making book

HARRY
Thanks Hedwig

He pets Hedwig and she flies off back to the Owlery

HERMIONE
Oh good, now you can give that graffitied copy back.

HARRY
Are you mad? I’m keeping it! I’ll give Slughorn back the new one, he can’t complain.

Hermione frowns and grabs the Daily Prophet and starts to read.

RON
Anyone we know dead?

HERMIONE
No, but there have been more dementor attacks and an arrest...Stan Stunpike.

HARRY
What?!?

HERMIONE
Yes,
(The camera pans over here shoulder to show the glaring face of Stan Shunpike)
Stanley Shunpike, conductor on the popular Wizarding conveyance the Knight Bus, has been arrested on suspicion of Death Eater activity.

HARRY
Stan Shunpike, a Death Eater? That’s not possible.

RON
He might have been under the Imperius Curse, you never can tell.

HERMIONE
This is horrible. Did you see today in Herbology? They called Hannah Abbott out of class to tell her that her mother was found dead.

RON
Yeah, things have been going crazy lately. People are terrified. The Patil twins’ parents want them to go home.

HARRY
What! But Hogwarts is safer than their homes, bound to be! We’ve got Aurors, and all those extra protective spells, and we’ve got Dumbledore!

HERMIONE
I don’t think we’ve got him all the time. Haven’t you noticed? His seat’s been empty an awful lot lately.

Harry and Ron look up at the staff table and we see Dumbledore’s seat is empty. Professor Slughorn is walking down towards them.

SLUGHORN
Harry, Harry, just the man I was hoping to see! What do you say to a spot of supper tonight in my rooms? I hope very much that Miss Granger will favor me by coming too.

HERMIONE
Oh thanks…um…

HARRY
I can’t come, Professor. I’ve got a detention with Professor Snape.

SLUGHORN
Oh dear, I was counting on you, Harry! Well, now, I’ll just have to have a word with Severus and explain the situation. Yes, I’m sure I’ll see you both there.

Slughorn walks away towards the staff table to talk to Snape and the scene cuts to…

INT- CORRIDOR-DAY


Harry, Hermione, and Ron walking to class and a young man named Cormac McLaggen walks up behind Harry and taps him on his shoulder.

HARRY
Yes?

CORMAC
We met on the train, in old Sluggy’s compartment. Cormac McLaggen, Keeper. Just wanted to introduce myself before trials today

He looks at Ron and throws him a dirty look

HARRY
Right…well I guess I’ll see you then.

CORMAC
Yeah, and by the way Potter. You’ll go wrong not to pick me…(he walks away.)

RON
Who in the bloody hell does he think he is? I hope he doesn’t think he’ll get special treatment because you’re both some of Slughorns favorites!

HARRY
A lot of people have signed up for Quidditch this year. I dunno why the team’s this popular all of a sudden

HERMIONE
It’s not the Quidditch Harry…it’s you. You’ve never been more interesting, and frankly, you’ve never been more fanciable

Snape walks towards them and stops when he see’s Harry

SNAPE
You are to be in my office at half past eight tonight to do your detention Potter. No matter how many party invitations you have received.

He sneers then walks away as …


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  #65  
Old December 14th, 2007, 11:18 pm
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
Oh MY ArryGrotter have I been gone away from this thread this long? Wow I have a lot of catching up to do lol. I'll read through some of your scripts and I'll post the next section of my old HBP screenplay. Let me know what you think! Remember I wrote this LONG before the OOTP movie came out so a certain spell that was used in THAT movie is still here..just ignore it

INT. BOYS DORMITORY-THAT NIGHT

The scene fades to a shot of Ron in the bed snoring. The camera then pans to Harry looking in his Advanced Potions book using his wand as a light. We see a shot of what Harry is reading and zooms in on the word ‘Levicorpus (nvbl)’ Harry mouths the words and then sits the book down. He grabs his wand and flicks it and there’s a flash of light. BOOM! We hear Ron screaming and the camera pans to him hanging upside down like there’s a hook holding his leg in midair. Dean and Seamus run over and begin to laugh.

HARRY
Oh..um…sorry Ron. Hang on…I’ll let you down…

He grabs for his book and looks through the pages. He drops the book and points the wand at Ron. There’s a flash of light and Ron falls to his mattress.

HARRY
Sorry.

RON
(In an exhausted voice)
Tomorrow, I’d rather you set the alarm clock.

INT-HOGWARTS-THE GREAT HALL-MORNING

The scene cuts to a shot of Hogwarts and follows an owl through the the Great Hall. The camera then pans down to Harry, Ron, and Hermione at the Gryffindor table.

HERMIONE
So you just decided to try out an unknown, handwritten incantation and see what would happen?

HARRY
Why does it matter if it’s handwritten?

HERMIONE
Because it’s probably not Ministry of Magic approved and also because I’m starting to think this Prince character was a bit dodgy.

RON
It was a laugh Hermione, that’s all. Calm down. You just don’t like the Prince because he’s better than you in Potions…

Hermione
It’s got nothing to do wih that! I just think its very irresponsible to start performing spells when you don’t even know what they’re for! Half Blood Prince, I bet it’s just a stupid nickname, and it doesn’t seem as though he’s a very nice person to me!

Hundreds of Owls start to fly into the Great Hall carrying packages

HARRY
Hermione if he’d been a budding Death Eater he wouldn’t have been boasting about being ‘half-blood’ would he?

HERMIONE
The Death Eaters can’t all be pure blood, and I bet it’s only Muggle-borns they hate, they’d be quite happy to let you and Ron join up!

RON
There’s no way they’d let me be a Death Eater, my whole family are blood traitors! That’s as bad as Muggle-borns to them!

HARRY
And they’d love to have me, we’d be best pals if they didn’t keep trying to do me in.

Hedwig lands a large package in front of Harry. Harry opens the pack and it’s a new copy of the Advanced Potion Making book

HARRY
Thanks Hedwig

He pets Hedwig and she flies off back to the Owlery

HERMIONE
Oh good, now you can give that graffitied copy back.

HARRY
Are you mad? I’m keeping it! I’ll give Slughorn back the new one, he can’t complain.

Hermione frowns and grabs the Daily Prophet and starts to read.

RON
Anyone we know dead?

HERMIONE
No, but there have been more dementor attacks and an arrest...Stan Stunpike.

HARRY
What?!?

HERMIONE
Yes,
(The camera pans over here shoulder to show the glaring face of Stan Shunpike)
Stanley Shunpike, conductor on the popular Wizarding conveyance the Knight Bus, has been arrested on suspicion of Death Eater activity.

HARRY
Stan Shunpike, a Death Eater? That’s not possible.

RON
He might have been under the Imperius Curse, you never can tell.

HERMIONE
This is horrible. Did you see today in Herbology? They called Hannah Abbott out of class to tell her that her mother was found dead.

RON
Yeah, things have been going crazy lately. People are terrified. The Patil twins’ parents want them to go home.

HARRY
What! But Hogwarts is safer than their homes, bound to be! We’ve got Aurors, and all those extra protective spells, and we’ve got Dumbledore!

HERMIONE
I don’t think we’ve got him all the time. Haven’t you noticed? His seat’s been empty an awful lot lately.

Harry and Ron look up at the staff table and we see Dumbledore’s seat is empty. Professor Slughorn is walking down towards them.

SLUGHORN
Harry, Harry, just the man I was hoping to see! What do you say to a spot of supper tonight in my rooms? I hope very much that Miss Granger will favor me by coming too.

HERMIONE
Oh thanks…um…

HARRY
I can’t come, Professor. I’ve got a detention with Professor Snape.

SLUGHORN
Oh dear, I was counting on you, Harry! Well, now, I’ll just have to have a word with Severus and explain the situation. Yes, I’m sure I’ll see you both there.

Slughorn walks away towards the staff table to talk to Snape and the scene cuts to…

INT- CORRIDOR-DAY


Harry, Hermione, and Ron walking to class and a young man named Cormac McLaggen walks up behind Harry and taps him on his shoulder.

HARRY
Yes?

CORMAC
We met on the train, in old Sluggy’s compartment. Cormac McLaggen, Keeper. Just wanted to introduce myself before trials today

He looks at Ron and throws him a dirty look

HARRY
Right…well I guess I’ll see you then.

CORMAC
Yeah, and by the way Potter. You’ll go wrong not to pick me…(he walks away.)

RON
Who in the bloody hell does he think he is? I hope he doesn’t think he’ll get special treatment because you’re both some of Slughorns favorites!

HARRY
A lot of people have signed up for Quidditch this year. I dunno why the team’s this popular all of a sudden

HERMIONE
It’s not the Quidditch Harry…it’s you. You’ve never been more interesting, and frankly, you’ve never been more fanciable

Snape walks towards them and stops when he see’s Harry

SNAPE
You are to be in my office at half past eight tonight to do your detention Potter. No matter how many party invitations you have received.

He sneers then walks away as …
It HAS been a bit lonely posting 3 or 4 times in a row.

Did you move Levicorpus earlier? I actually find that effective, that way there the whole Prince good/evil argement can start earlier.


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  #66  
Old December 14th, 2007, 11:32 pm
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Posts: 608
Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Quote:
Originally Posted by ArryGrotter View Post
It HAS been a bit lonely posting 3 or 4 times in a row.

Did you move Levicorpus earlier? I actually find that effective, that way there the whole Prince good/evil argement can start earlier.
Awwww well I'll try my best to keep up with it this time

I see you've moved on past PS and have been dabbling in the other stories aswell lol. You're better than me..I've had writers block on my DH screenplay for...oh...3 months now and haven't touched it lol

Yeah I moved Levicorpus up right after Harry's 1st lesson with Dumbledore....have to keep the tension up..and if I remember correctly I moved a few different Great Halls scenes into the one you just read....kills 40 birds with one boulder



Last edited by Phrozenone; December 15th, 2007 at 10:14 am.
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  #67  
Old December 17th, 2007, 9:06 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Well I've been doing a bit more on PS.

For anyone interested, I've been compelling changes/additions/etc. in a document, so one day I can look back at how much has changed since the first write (ie Post 1). Each change is shown with colour and even now that document is becoming a multi-coloured script. If you haven't guessed click this link to see it. (You might need flash or something to see it properly. I'm not entirely sure)


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  #68  
Old December 19th, 2007, 9:54 pm
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Well in light of todays casting news I decided to add the next part of my old HBP screenplay that includes 3 of the newly casted members lol. I didn't want to actual show QUidditch so the following scene is the aftermath and don't worry, we won't be seeing that actual funeral for Aragog

EXT. QUIDDITCH STADIUM
The scene fades to a shot of the Quidditch stadium. The camera then cranes down and we see that Quidditch tryouts have been held and Harry is announcing who’s made the team.

HARRY
Due to the fact that McLaggen only saved 4 and Ron saved 5 I think it’s only fair to award Ron the postion.

McLaggen storms up to Harry

CORMAC
His sister didn’t really try. She gave him an easy save!

HARRY
Rubbish, that was the one he nearly missed.

CORMAC
Give me another go!

HARRY
No. Now if you don’t mind, get out of my face.

Cormac frowns and storms off and we see Harry look at Ginny and smile. It is the first time he looks at Ginny this way, as if there’s something different about her. The camera zooms in on her and she smiles back as Dean comes and grabbes her by the hand and takes her away. We see the smile fade from Harry’s face and Ron walks up to him.

RON
I did alright didn’t I?

HARRY
Yeah and good thing to. Now I don’t have to deal with that McLaggen?

Lavender Brown with one of her friends walk up to them.

LAVENDER
You were amazing Ron…

RON
Oh…thanks Lavender.

LAVENDER
See you around…
(She grabs her friends arm and they walk away giggling.)

RON
What the bloody hell was that about?

Ron and Harry look at each other and the scene cuts to

EXT. OUTSIDE HAGRIDS HUT MOMENTS LATER
Harry and Ron walking towards Hagrids Hut and the camera pans to a barrel full of what looked like foot long maggots, that are slimy, white, and writhing.

RON
Hagrid..hey….
(notices the slimey maggots).
What the bloody hell are those?

HAGRID
Oh hey….Jus’ giant grubs

RON
And they grow into…?

HAGRID
They won’ grow inter nuthin’, I got em tter feed Aragog
(He pauses and then starts to cry)

HARRY
Hagrid…what’s….

HAGRID
It’s…him….Aragog…I think he’s dyin…I don’t know what I’ll do if he…if he….We’ve bin tergether so long…

HARRY
Hagrid I….is there anything we can do?

HAGRID
I don’ think so Harry, see the rest o’ the tribe, Aragog’s family…they’re getting a bit funny now he’s ill…bit restive…

RON
Yeah, I think we saw a bit of that side of them in our second year....

HAGRID
I don’t reckon it’d be safe fer anyone but me ter go near the colony at the mo But thanks fer offerin, it means a lot…

Hagrid walks away from them and the scene fades to'

EXT. HOGSMEADE-DAY

Hogsmeade. We see shots of different students going into various shops.

INT-THREE BROOMSTICKS-DAY
The camera pans to a shop named Honeydukes and goes inside where we see Harry, Ron, and Hermione drinking a Butterbeer.

RON
Wonderful

HERMIONE
Honestly Ron, we know you fancy her and all but…

Hermione looks over at the bar and we see Madam Rosmerta making drinks for someone.

RON
What? No! You got it all wrong…I..ugh..was talking about the Butterbeer!

HERMIONE
We all know how much you fancy Madam Rosmerta Ron
(She laughs)

RON
Jealous?

HERMIONE
Why….of course not
(She clears her throat and looks at Harry to quickly change the subject.)
Are you all right? You haven’t touched your Butterbeer?

HARRY
Yeah, it’s just that Slughorn is driving me mad, he keeps trying to get me to come to those parties.

HERMIONE
They’re not so bad, they’re even quite fun.

RON
Speaking of Slughorn…

Slughorn walks into the pub and makes his way towards their table.

SLUGHORN
Harry m’boy! I can’t have you missing anymore of my little suppers. I’m determined to have you! Miss Granger loves them, don’t you?

HERMIONE
Yes, they’re really…

SLUGHORN
So why don’t you come along, Harry?

HARRY
Oh...I have Quidditch practice.

SLUGHORN
Well I certainly expect you to win your first match. Well, how about Monday night?

HARRY
Can’t, I have a meeting with Dumbledore

SLUGHORN
Unlucky again! You can’t evade me forever, Harry!

He bows and walks away.

RON
He acts like I’m not even here, I’ve yet to get invited to these parties.

HERMIONE
Oh they’re not all they’re made up to be Ron.

RON
Yeah…right…you were just talking about how great they are!

HERMIONE
I did not! Oh honestly Ron you’re overreacting.

Harry turns and looks out of the window as they continue to argue. He see’s Ginny and Dean walk by eating candy. He smiles slightly as…

EXT- OUTSIDE OF HOGSMEADE
The scene cuts to Harry, Ron, and Hermione walking back to school. There are two girls arguing in the background. Harry, Ron, and Hermione turn around to see what the fuss is about. It’s Katie Bell and Her friend Leanne.

KATIE
It’s nothing to do with you, Leanne!

LEANNE
Katie stop being a….

She reaches for the package that Katie is holding and Katie tugged it back and the package fell to the ground. All at once Katie rises in the air with her arms outstretched with her hair whipping around her by a feirce wind. Her eyes and closed and then she lets out a terrible scream. Her eyes open and Leanne begins to scream. She runs to Katie and tries to pull her down by her ankles. Harry, Ron, and Hermione run up to help and when they grab her she falls and Harry and Ron catches her. She’s shaking tremendously. They lower her to the ground and she’s thrasing and screaming. The scene cuts to Hagrid picking Katie up.

HAGRID
It’s ok, I’ll be taking her to the hospital wing.
He walks away as she continues to scream. Hermione goes to comfort Leanne and Ron walks bends down and we see a shot of an ornate opal necklace that’s sticking out of the paper. He reaches down to grab it but Harry grabs his arm.

HARRY
Don’t touch it! I’ve seen this before, it was on display in Borgin and Burks ages ago. The label said it was cursed… Katie must have touched it.
(He gets up and walks towards Leanne.)
How did Katie get hold of this?

LEANNE
Well that’s why we were arguing. She came back from the bathroom in the Three Broomsticks holding it, said it was a surprise for somebody at Hogwarts and she had to deliver it. She looked all funny when she….oh no…I bet she’d been Imperiused and I didn’t realize!
(She starts to cry in Hermione’s shoulder.)

HERMIONE
We’d better get up to school.

HARRY
She didn’t say who’d given it to her, Leanne?

LEANNE
No…she wouldn’t tell me.

INT. McGONNAGELLS OFFICE-NIGHT
The scene cuts to the Harry, Ron, and Hermione sitting in Professor McGonagalls office.

PROFESSOR McGONAGALL
So what happened when Katie touched the necklace?

HARRY
She rose up in the air and then bagan to scream, and collasped. Professor, can I see Professor Dumbledore, please?

McGONAGALL
The headmaster is away until Monday, Potter.

HARRY
Away?

McGONAGALL
Yes, Potter, away. But anything you have to say about this horrible business can be said to me, I’m sure!

HARRY
(He looks at both Ron and Hermione and back to McGonnagal.)
I think Draco Malfoy gave Katie that necklace, Professor.

McGONAGALL
That is a very serious accusation, Potter. Do you have any proof?

HARRY
Well…no…but you must trust me.

McGONAGALL
Potter, you cannot point the finger of blame at Mr. Malfoy, he was not in Hogsmeade today. He was doing detention with me. And it might interest you to know Potter that Mr. Filch has set up Secrecy Sensors all over the school grounds. Any Dark object will be found, even the owls have extra security! Now if that is all, good day to you all!

INT-MOVING STAIRCASE-NIGHT
The scene cuts to the three of them walking towards their common room on the MOVING STAIRCASES

RON
Who do you think Katie was supposed to give the necklace to?

HERMIONE
Whoever it was has had a narrow escape don’t you think? No one could have opened that package without touching the necklace.

HARRY
It could’ve been meant for loads of people. Dumbledore, Slughorn…I wonder why Malfoy told her to take it into the castle.

HERMIONE
Harry, Malfoy wasn’t in Hogsmeade!

HARRY
He must have used an accomplice then.

RON
(Irritably)
Oh drop it, Harry!

HARRY
Don’t take that tone with me! It’s not my fault Slughorn invited Hermione and me to his stupid party, neither of us wanted to go, you know?

RON
Well, as I’m not invited to any parties, I think I’ll go to bed.
(He walks away from them angrily)

HERMIONE
Harry you should apologize. I know you’re convinced that Malfoys somehow at fault but he wasn’t there….

HARRY
He is involved Hermione, and I’m going to find out how.

She sighs knowing that there’s no point in arguing and The scene fades.


Oh Arry there is just SO much. I like some of the things but you have ALOT of things there. Why the prophecy at the beginning? You're introducing something that won't get brought up again until the 5th film and probably won't be resolved until the 6th. I mean it's an interesting concept and if this was a trilogy I'd say yeah good idea! It'll be interesting to see how your series shapes up though. What is the time limit you're giving yourself?

Just remember Peter Jackson had to fight really hard to get LOTR that long and the thing LOTR had that Harry Potter doesn't are huge battles that lasted 20+ mins. Keep it up though it's very interesting.


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  #69  
Old December 20th, 2007, 12:09 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

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Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
Well in light of todays casting news I decided to add the next part of my old HBP screenplay that includes 3 of the newly casted members lol. I didn't want to actual show QUidditch so the following scene is the aftermath and don't worry, we won't be seeing that actual funeral for Aragog
Those Harry/Ginny moments are good, and I almost laughed at the arguement over Rosmerta.

But "Bloody hell"? I hate that line. It doesn't seem Ron to me and it's overuse through out the movie series is annoying

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
Oh Arry there is just SO much. I like some of the things but you have ALOT of things there. Why the prophecy at the beginning? You're introducing something that won't get brought up again until the 5th film and probably won't be resolved until the 6th. I mean it's an interesting concept and if this was a trilogy I'd say yeah good idea! It'll be interesting to see how your series shapes up though. What is the time limit you're giving yourself?

Just remember Peter Jackson had to fight really hard to get LOTR that long and the thing LOTR had that Harry Potter doesn't are huge battles that lasted 20+ mins. Keep it up though it's very interesting.
I'm glad you like at least some of it.

The prophecy bit I added just to add mystery to the film, really. To add something that won't be resolved till later. I think this is important in a series. IMO, the real movies don't do this well. The important things for later get glossed over, and when they need remembering, you won't. (I'm not that good at writing out a point, so I hope you understand)

I hope to finish at roughly 130 pages. I'm about 1/3 way through the book and about 1/3 way through the limit, so I'm kind of OK, but I think the bulk of the pages will probably go to the last chapters, so then I'll be in trouble.



Last edited by ArryGrotter; December 20th, 2007 at 12:16 am.
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Old December 20th, 2007, 12:27 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Quote:
Originally Posted by ArryGrotter View Post
Those Harry/Ginny moments are good, and I almost laughed at the arguement over Rosmerta.

But "Bloody hell"? I hate that line. It doesn't seem Ron to me and it's overuse through out the movie series is annoying



I'm glad you like at least some of it.

The prophecy bit I added just to add mystery to the film, really. To add something that won't be resolved till later. I think this is important in a series. IMO, the real movies don't do this well. The important things for later get glossed over, and when they need remembering, you won't. (I'm not that good at writing out a point, so I hope you understand)

I hope to finish at roughly 130 pages. I'm about 1/3 way through the book and about 1/3 way through the limit, so I'm kind of OK, but I think the bulk of the pages will probably go to the last chapters, so then I'll be in trouble.
Hehehe that's the reason I've put it in my script. I guess I got so used to 'bloody hell' from the other movies i decided to keep up the tradition

And I see your point. The thing about the real movies is when the 1st one was done only 4 book were out right? (Or was it 3) so they couldn't really foreshadow with the whole prophecy thing seeing that they didn't know about it lol.

I mean it is interesting but I just feels it's to much. 130 pages huh? Interesting...that means you're going to have to adapt your butt off as you get near the end of the story. Just remember focus on what's important...merge scenes...move things around to have a nice flow going. Do you plan on writing a Quidditch game?


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Old December 20th, 2007, 1:40 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

I probably will make a shorter Quidditch scene than in the real movie. I.e. jumping straight to when Harry is jinxed


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Old December 20th, 2007, 8:34 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

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I probably will make a shorter Quidditch scene than in the real movie. I.e. jumping straight to when Harry is jinxed
That's cool. Quidditch is hard to write though imo..that's why I try to avoid it as much as possible lol. Well as a treat here is the next part of the screenplay. Let me know what you think!

INT. ORPHANAGE-MIDDAY (SIXTY YEARS AGO)

The scene fades to a shot of an old ORPHANAGE. The scene cuts to the back of MRS. COLE head as she writes something. There is a creak at the door and she looks up to see Dumbledore walking towards a woman. The camera pans over to his right and we see modern day Harry and Dumbledore walking behind him.

HARRY
Nice suit, sir.

DUMBLEDORE
Why thank you.

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
Hello, my name is Albus Dumbledore. I am a teacher and I have come to offer Tom a place at my school.

MRS. COLE
And how come you’re interested in Tom?

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
We believe he has qualities we are looking for.
(He takes out a slip of paper.)
I think this will make everything clear.

(Mrs. Cole grabs the parchment and looks over it.)

MRS. COLE
This looks in order; may I offer you a glass of gin?

INT-MRS. COLE’S OFFICE-MIDDAY(MOMENTS LATER)

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
I was wondering whether you could tell me anything of Tom Riddle’s history? I think he was born here in the orphanage?

MRS. COLE
That’s right, it was a nasty night.
(There is a FLASH and the scene plays out as she talks. We see Merope running, pregnant, in the rain towards the orphanage and pushes the door open)
This girl, not much older than I was myself at the time, came and we took her in.
(Merope is now in the bed screaming in pain as young Mrs. Cole wipes a wet towel over her head and a baby is brought into the frame and sat on her chest)
She had the baby in an hour and she was dead in another hour. She told me he was to be named Tom for his father, and Marvolo, for her father and his surname was to be Riddle.
(As she says this we see Merope take her final breath and die. Young Mrs. Cole picks up the baby and there is a shot of the baby looking up at her. Not crying just silent.)
She died soon after that without another word.
(There is another FLASH as we're back to modern day and she takes a sip of gin)
He’s a funny boy.

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
Oh really, how so?

MRS. COLE
He’s definitely got a place at your school you say? And nothing I can say will change that?

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
Nothing.

MRS. COLE
Well…he scares the other children.

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
You mean he’s a bully?

MRS. COLE
I think he must be but it’s very hard to catch him at it. For instance we took them out once to the seaside for a summer outing. Amy Benson and Dennis Bishop were never quite right afterwards, and all we ever got out of them was that they’d gone into a cave with Tom Riddle.

DUMBLEDORE
A cave?

MRS. COLE
Yes and he swore they’d just gone exploring, but something happened in there, I’m sure of it.

INT-TOM’S BEDROOM-MIDDAY (MOMENTS LATER)

The scene cuts to Mrs. Cole opening a door and walking in. Old Dumbledore follows as does Modern Dumbledore and Harry. We see sitting on the bed a young boy, A young Tom Riddle.

MRS. COLE
Tom you’ve got a visitor. This is Mr. Dumberton…sorry, Dunderbore.
(She turns to Dumbledore)
Call me when you’re done.

Mrs. Cole exits

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
How do you do, Tom? I am Professor Dumbledore.

TOM
Professor? What are you here for? Did she get you in to have a look at me?

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
No, in fact I contacted her.

TOM
I don’t believe you. She wants me looked at, doesn’t she? Tell the truth!

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
I have no reason to lie to you Tom and please watch your tone. I work at a school called Hogwarts. I have come to offer you a place at my school, if you would like to come.

TOM
You’re from the asylum aren’t you? That old cat’s the one who should be in the asylum. I never did anything to little Amy Benson or Dennis Bishop, you can ask them!

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
I am not from the asylum. Hogwarts is a school for people with special abilities…

TOM
I’M NOT MAD!

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
I know that you are not mad. Hogwarts is not a school for mad people. It is a school of magic.

TOM
(With a stunned look on his face.)
Magic…it’s magic what I can do?

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
What is it that you can do?

TOM
(Excited)
All sorts. I can make things move without touching them. I can make animals do what I want them to do, without training them. I can make bad things happen to people who annoy me. I can make them hurt if I want to. I knew I was different, I knew I was special.

HARRY
Wow, he believed it much quicker than I did sir.

DUMBLDORE
Yes, Tom was perfectly ready to believe that he was special.

TOM
Are you a wizard too?

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
Yes, I am.

TOM
Prove it.

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
If, as I take it, you are accepting your place at Hogwarts….

TOM
Of course I am!

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
Then you are to address me as ‘Professor’ or ‘sir’

Dumbledore takes out his wand and points in at the wardrobe in the corner. BANG! It bursts into flame. Tom stares with excitement in his eyes and Dumbledore waves his wand again and its back to normal.

TOM
Where can I get one of them?

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
All in good time, I think there is something trying to get out of your wardrobe. Open the door.

Tom hesitates and then walks over and opens the wardrobe door. He pulls out a cardboard box that is shaking. He opens it and it’s has a yo yo, a silver thimble, and a tarnished mouth organ in it.

DUMBLEDORE
Notice how Tom likes to collect trophies Harry. Those items in that box were taken from victims of his bullying behavior, souvenirs, if you will, of particulary unpleasant bits of magic. Bare in mind this magpie like tendency, for this, particularly, will be important later.

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
Is there anything in that box that you ought not to have?

TOM
I suppose so, sir.

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
You are to return them to their owners with your apologies. And be warned: Thieving is not tolerated at Hogwarts. Hogwarts can expel students and the Ministry of Magic will punish lawbreakers. All new wizards must accept that, in entering our world, they abide by our laws.

TOM
Yes, sir. There’s one problem though… I don’t have any money.

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
There is a fund at Hogwarts for those who require assistance to buy books and robes.

TOM
Where do you buy spellbooks?

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
In Diagon Alley, I can help you find everything…

TOM
I don’t need you, I’m used to doing things for myself. How do you get to this Diagon Alley…sir?

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
You will be able to see it. Ask for Tom the barman…
(Tom frowns when the name Tom is said.)
You dislike the name ‘Tom’?

TOM
There are a lot of Toms.

DUMBLEDORE
As you just saw Harry, he hated anything that tied him to other people, anything that made him ordinary. He shed his name, as you know, within a few short years of this and created the mask of ‘Lord Voldemort’ behind which he has been hidden for so long.

TOM
When do I come to this Hogwarts?

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
All the details are there Tom. You will leave from King’s Cross-station on the first of September.

TOM
I can speak to snakes. Is that normal for a wizard?

YOUNG DUMBLEDORE
It is unusual, but not unheard of.
(HE turns and walks towards the door.)
Good bye Tom…I shall see you in Hogwarts.

The scene shows a shot of Tom looking at Dumbledore. The camera then pans back through the door and slams.

INT-COURTYARD-EVENING (NEXT DAY)

The scene cuts to Harry, Hermione, and Ron walking outside of Hogwarts in the courtyard.

RON
I still don’t get why Dumbledore’s showing you all this. I mean, what’s the point?

HERMIONE
I think it’s fascinating actually. It makes total sense to know as much about Voldemort as possible, how else will you find out his weaknesses?

RON
So how was Slughorn’s latest party?

HERMIONE
It was quite fun actually. I mean he drones on about famouse ex pupils a bit, and he absolutely fawns over McLaggen because he’s so well connected, but it was really nice.

RON
Oh yeah such a great thing to spend an evening with McLaggen huh Hermione.

HERMIONE
Jealous?

RON
Well I….

HERMIONE
Anyways, he’s going to have a Christmas party and Harry there’s no way to wiggle out of this one because he actually asked me to check your free evenings, so he could be sure to have it on a night you could come.

HARRY
Excellent, thanks Hermione

RON
And this is another party just for Slughorns favorites, isn’t it?

HERMIONE
The Slug Club, yes.

RON
Slug Club! That’s pathetic. Well I hope you enjoy the party Hermione, why don’t you try hooking up with McLaggen, you guys could be King and Queen Slug.
(He and Harry laugh)

HERMIONE
Well we are allowed to bring guests and I was going to ask you to come, but if you think it’s stupid then I won’t bother.

RON
(With a slight blush and amazed look on his face)
You…. were going to ask me?

HERMIONE
Yes, but obviously if you’d rather I hooked up with McLaggen

RON
No..um what I meant was…

HERMIONE
I’m off to the library, see you two.

(She walks away with a slight smile on her face)

RON
Was she serious? Do you think she was serious? Or was she just…you know…

HARRY
Oh Ron, you act like you actually want to go to Slughorns party.

RON
Oh…me..no…I mean…unless she asked me of course. But then I’ll be going just to be a good friend, not that I’ll enjoy it or anything.

HARRY
(Laughing)
You’re pathetic

(They turn around and corner and see Ginny and Dean kissing.)

RON
What the…(They stop kissing.)

GINNY
What?

RON
I don’t want to find my own sister snogging people in public.

DEAN
C’mon Ginny lets go back to the common room…

GINNY
You go, I want a word with my dear brother!
(He kisses her on the cheek and walks away.)
Lets get this straight once and for all. It is none of your business who I go out with or what I do with them, Ron…

RON
Yeah, it is! D’you think I want people saying my sister’s a…

GINNY
A what exactly?

HARRY
He doesn’t mean anything, Ginny…

GINNY
Oh yes he does! Just because he’s never snogged anyone in his life, just because the best kiss he’s ever had is from our Auntie Muriel…

RON
Shut your mouth!

GINNY
No, I will not! If you went out and got a bit of snogging done yourself, you wouldn’t mind so much that everyone else does it!

RON
(He pulls his wand out)
You don’t know what you’re talking about!
(Harry jumps between them)
Just because I don’t do it in public!!

GINNY
Oh come off it Ron! Or have you got a picture of Auntie Muriel stashed under your pillow?

A streak of orange light flies from his wand and BANG! it hits the wall beside Ginny’s head. Harry grabs his and pushes him against the wall.

HARRY
Don’t be stupid…

GINNY
(Near Tears)
Harry’s snogged Cho Chang and Hermione snogged Victor Krum, it’s only you who acts like it’s something disgusting, Ron, and that’s because you’ve got as much experience of a six year old!

She turns around and storms off. Ron puts his wand away.

HARRY
You ok?

RON
Yeah, she’s just being stupid.
(They start to walk.)
Um Harry? D’you think Hermione really snogged Krum?

HARRY
Oh…um…look at the time gotta go

He runs off leaving Ron with a confused look on his face as the scene cuts to….


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  #73  
Old December 20th, 2007, 9:35 pm
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

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Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
Well as a treat here is the next part of the screenplay. Let me know what you think!
I didn't have time to read this yesterday, so...

I like how you moved the aftermath of the Penseive into the Penseive (Though I do miss "The mouth organ was only ever a mouth organ")

And next comes some of my favourite scenes, though I am dissapointed with the scene move (Herbology>Courtyard, etc.) and that is sure to happen in the real HBP.

This is just personal choice, but in the UK ed, Ron/Hermione say "got off with McClaggen" instead of "hook up with McClaggen" and, IMO, I'd preferr "got off", mainly because its the UK way.

"Look at the time" was so cheesy! Worst line ever!

I can't wait to see you write the party.


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Old December 20th, 2007, 11:39 pm
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Quote:
Originally Posted by ArryGrotter View Post
I didn't have time to read this yesterday, so...

I like how you moved the aftermath of the Penseive into the Penseive (Though I do miss "The mouth organ was only ever a mouth organ")

And next comes some of my favourite scenes, though I am dissapointed with the scene move (Herbology>Courtyard, etc.) and that is sure to happen in the real HBP.

This is just personal choice, but in the UK ed, Ron/Hermione say "got off with McClaggen" instead of "hook up with McClaggen" and, IMO, I'd preferr "got off", mainly because its the UK way.

"Look at the time" was so cheesy! Worst line ever!

I can't wait to see you write the party.


Oh come on! It isn't as cheesy as 'I love magic' is it?!?! lol Well what's a Harry Potter film without a little cheese huh? Thanks for the UK reference because I honestly have no idea (Like Kloves huh? )

Since it's the holiday season I decided instead of waiting another month I'd post the party scene for you enjoyment. Plus I have to make up time since I disappeared for a few months lol. So here is the next section of the script and I'm sure you're going to have plenty of comments for this one lol. (Hopefully it's not full of cheese )

INT-CORRIDOR/GRYFFINDOR COMMON ROOM-NIGHT (SAME DAY)

Harry walking down the corrider leaving Detention with Snape. He walks into the common room and we see Ginny walk up towards him from the crowd in the middle of the room.

HARRY
Hey Ginny. Have you seen…

GINNY
Looking for Ron? He’s over there, the filthy hypocrite.

Ron and Lavender Brown are sitting in a chair kissing heavily

GINNY
It looks like he’s eating her face, but I suppose he’s got to refine his technique somehow huh?

Harry chuckles as Ginny walks off to join Dean as Hermione comes through the portrait into the common room and see’s Ron and Lavender and stops in her tracks. She turns around quickly and walks out. Harry looks over at where she was and follows.

INT-CLASSROOM-NIGHT (MOMENTS LATER)

Harry walks into the classroom where Hermione is sitting alone. She has a small ring of yellow birds circling her head.

HARRY
Hermione?

HERMIONE
Oh, hello Harry. I was just practicing.

HARRY
They’re really good.

HERMIONE
Thanks…

HARRY
Are you alright?

Before she could answer the door opens and Ron and Lavender run in holding hands and laughing.

RON
Oh….

LAVENDER
Oops

She laughs, kisses Ron, and walks out of the room.

There is an awkward silence for a second.

RON
Hi, Harry! Wondered where you’d got to!

Hermione stands up and the birds are still circling her head.

HERMIONE
You shouldn’t leave Lavender waiting outside.

(She walks slowly towards the door. Harry and Ron both look at each other. Hermione stops at the entrance of the door and turns around.)

Oppugno!!!

She points her wand at Ron and the birds all sped towards Ron and start pecking and clawing at him. He starts to scream and try and get them out of his face. She smiles a little and walks out of them room.

INT-THE GREAT HALL-DAY

Ron and Harry are sitting in the Great Hall. Harry is reading a book. While Ron is talking its clear that Harry is ignoring him.

RON
She can’t complain she snogged Krum. I never promised Hermione anything. I mean, alright, I was going to go to Slughorns Christmas party with her, but just as friends…I’m a free agent.

INT-GREAT HALL-LATER THAT DAY

The camera pans over and now it’s just Harry and Hermione sitting in the Great Hall. He’s reading his Advanced Potions book.

HERMIONE
He’s at perfect liberty to kiss whomever he likes! I really couldn’t care less.

She starts to write something furiously on the parchment in front of her.

INT. POTIONS CLASS (DAY)/GREAT HALL(AFTERNOON)/CORRIDOR(NIGHT)

The camera cuts to them in class and we see a shot of Ron and Lavender. He raises his hand mocking how Hermione always does. Harry looks at this then turns to look at Hermione who gets up and walks out of the room furiously.

Now Ron and Harry are sitting in the Great Hall eating dinner and Hermione comes over and throws a pie in Rons face and storms off.

The scene cuts again to Harry and Hermione walking down the hallways of Hogwarts.

HERMIONE
Harry, you need to be careful.

HARRY
I’m not giving the book back Hermione.

HERMIONE
I’m not talking about your stupid so-called Prince Harry. I went into the girl’s bathroom just before I came in here and I overheard Romilda Vane talking to some of her friends. They’re all hoping you’re going to take them to Slughorn’s party, and they all seem to have bought Fred and George’s love potions.. I’d just invite someone to go with if I was you.

HARRY
There isn’t anyone I want to invite.

HERMIONE
Well just be careful what you drink.

INT-MOVING STAIRWAY-SECONDS LATER

They start walking up the stairs towards the Common Room.

HARRY
Hang on, I thought Filch banned anything bought at Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes? How come these girls are able to bring love potions into school?

HERMIONE
Fred and George send them disguised as perfumes and cough potions.

HARRY
So if these girls are getting stuff into the school disguised as something else, why wouldn’t Malfoy have…

HERMIONE
Oh Harry please, not that again. Secrecy Sensors detect jinxes, curses, and concealment charms. They’re used to find Dark Magic and Dark objects. Love potions aren’t Dark or dangerous…

HARRY
Easy for you to say…

(They stop in front of the Fat Lady)

Baubles!

FAT LADY
Same to you…

The portrait swings open they walk into the common room and Romilda Vane looks up at them and turns to grab something from one of her friends and runs up to them.

ROMILDA
Hi Harry! Fancy a gillywater?

Hermione casts an ‘I told you so’ look to Harry.

HARRY
No thanks; I don’t like it much.

ROMILDA
Well, take these anyway
(She thrusts a box into his hands.)
Chocolate Cauldrons, they’ve got firewhisky in them. My gran sent them to me, but I don’t like them.

HARRY
Oh, thanks a lot.

Romilda smiles and walks back to her group of giggling friends

HERMIONE
Pathetic what some girls would do for a boy. Oh well I’m off to do more things to make Ron jealous.

As she walks away Harry casts an “I don’t think I’ll ever understand girls” look and

INT-BRIDGE-MIDDAY

The scene cuts to shot of Hogwarts covered in snow. Harry standing outside on the bridge with Hedwig and we see him looking at Ginny and Dean playing in the snow together.

HARRY
Am I being pathetic Hedwig, I mean she’s my best friends sister. How do you think Ron would react?
(Hedwig hoots)
Yeah you’re right…I mean she’s like a little sister, but there seems to be something…more.
(Hedwig hoots and Luna walks up next to him.)

LUNA
Hiya Harry!

HARRY
Oh hey Luna, how has your term been going?

LUNA
Oh it’s been all right. A bit lonely without the D.A. Ginny’s been nice, though and I just ran into Hermione, she seems a bit upset. She said something about that Ron Weasley….

HARRY
Yeah, they’ve had a row.

LUNA
He says very funny things sometimes, doesn’t he? But he can be a bit unkind, I noticed that last year.

HARRY
I suppose. Hey…Luna…how would you like to come to Slughorn’s party with me?

LUNA
(shocked)
Slughorn’s party? With you?

HARRY
Yeah. We’re supposed to bring guests, so I thought you might like…I mean just as friends, you know? But if you don’t want to…

LUNA
Oh, no, I’d love to go with you as friends! Nobody’s ever asked me to a party before, as a friend!

HARRY
Right, so I’ll meet you in the entrance hall at eight o’ clock then.

Luna smiles and skips off and …

INT-THE GREAT HALL-EVENING

The scene cuts to them in the Great Hall where there are Christmas decorations set up and a few elves singing Christmas songs.

RON
You’re taking Loony Lovegood!

GINNY
Don’t call her that Ron! I’m really glad you’re taking her Harry, she’s so excited.

(She walks over and sits with Dean and we see a shot of Hermione sitting down by herself at the end of the table. Parvati walks up to them.)

PARVATI
Hi, Harry.

HARRY
Hey, you’re staying at Hogwarts then? I heard your parents wanted you to leave.

PARVATI
I managed to talk them out of it for the time being.
(Hermione walks past them.)
Oh, hi Hermione!

HERMIONE
Hi, Parvati! Are you going to Slughorn’s party tonight?

PARVATI
No invite, you’re going aren’t you?

HERMIONE
Yes, I’m meeting Cormac McLaggen at eight.

(We see a shot of Ron turning around furiously and looking at her.)

PARVATI
Oh really? Are you going out with him, then?

HERMIONE
Oh…yes…didn’t you know?

PARVATI
No! Wow, you like your Quidditch players don’t you? First Krum, then McLaggen…

HERMIONE
I like really good Quidditch players.
(Ron frowns and furiously starts to eat his food)
Well I’m off to the library.
(She walks off and we see her smile and the scene cuts to…

INT. SLUGHORNS PARTY-NIGHT

The scene cuts to Slughorns party. There are teachers and students walking around and talking to each other. The camera pans to Harry and Luna walking into the room and Slughorn walks up to them

SLUGHORN
Harry, mboy! Welcome welcome. I’m glad to see you here!

HARRY
Yeah, thanks.
(He notices Hermione over in the corner.)
Oh, sorry sir I have to go see about a friend.
(He grabs Luna’s arm and they walk over to Hermione.)
Hermione?

HERMIONE
Harry! Thank goodness, Hi Luna!

HARRY
What happened to you?

HERMIONE
Oh, I’ve just escaped…I mean, I’ve just left Cormac. Under the mistletoe…

HARRY
Serves you right for coming with him.

HERMIONE
I thought he’d annoy Ron most. He makes Grawp look like a gentleman. Let’s go this way, we’ll be able to see him coming
(The three of them walk across the room towards Professor Trelawney.)

LUNA
Hello Professor.

TRELAWNY
Good evening, my dear. I haven’t seen you in my classes lately…

Harry turns to Hermione as Trelawney talks to Luna

HERMIONE
Do you see him?

HARRY
Yeah, as a matter of fact he’s coming this way

HERMIONE
Oh no!
(She ducks down and runs as McLaggen walks up to Harry and Luna.)

CORMAC
Potter!

HARRY
What do you want?

CORMAC
Hermione!
(Harry stares at him.)
I mean have you seen her?

HARRY
No
(Cormac gives Harry a slight frown and walks away. Harry turns to see Hermione sticking her head out from behind the wall. She mouths 'thank you' and ducsk again. Harry laughs then he turns around to Luna and Trelawney’s conversation.)

TRELAWNY
Harry Potter! My dear boy! The rumors! The stories! The Chosen One! Of course, I have known for a very long time. Why have you not returned to Divination?

HARRY
Well…um…
(Slughorn walks up to them and Harry for the first time acts as if he’s g lad to see him there)

SLUGHORN
Harry m’boy are you avoiding me?

HARRY
Um…no sir…

SLUGHORN
How are you Sybill?

TRELAWNY
Just fine thanks, just here wondering why Potter didn’t return to Divination, the subject is very important, especially for him.

SLUGHORN
We all think our subjects are important…ahhh Severus! Come and join us!

(The camera pans to Snape who was talking to another teacher. He turns and walks towards them.)

SLUGHORN
Have I told you about Harry’s exceptional potion making? Some credit must go to you, of course, you taught him for five years!

SNAPE
Funny, I never had the impression that I managed to teach Potter anything at all.

SLUGHORN
Well, it’s natural ability. You should have seen what he gave me, first lesson, Draught of Living Death…not even you managed it on your first attempt Severus.

SNAPE
Really?
(He casts a look at Harry.)

SLUGHORN
What other subjects are you taking m’boy?

HARRY
Well…there’s Defense Against the Dark Arts, Charms, Transfiguration…

SNAPE
All the subjects required, in short for an Auror.

HARRY
Yeah, well, that’s what I want to do.

LUNA
I don’t think you should be an Auror Harry. They are a part of the Rotfang Conspiracy. They’re working to bring down the Ministry of Magic from within using a combination of Dark Magic and gum disease.

(They all stare at her and we see Filch walk up holding Malfoy by the ear.)

FILCH
Professor Slughorn, I discovered this boy lurking in an upstairs corridor. He claims to have been invited to your party and to have been delayed in setting out?

MALFOY
All right, I wasn’t invited! I was trying to gatecrash, happy?

FILCH
No, I’m not! You’re in trouble, you are!

SLUGHORN
That’s all right, Argus. It’s Christmas, and it’s not a crime to want to come to a party. We’ll forget any punishment and you may stay, Draco.

(Filch gives an angry grunt and storms off.)

SNAPE
I’d like a word with you, Draco.

SLUGHORN
Oh, now, Severus it’s Christmas, don’t be too hard…

SNAPE
I’m his Head of House, and I shall decide how hard, or otherwise, to be. Follow me, Draco. (Snape turns and walks away and Malfoy follows him.)

HARRY
Um..Luna…I’ll be back in a bit…bathroom.

LUNA
All right.

TRELAWNY
So dear, tell me more about this Rotfang Conspiracy…

INT-HALLLWAY-NIGHT (MOMENTS LATER)

Harry walks out of the room into the dark quite corridor. He pulls out his Invisibility Cloak and throws it over himself. He then walks slowly down the hall and turns to corner and see’s Snape and Draco standing there.

SNAPE
You cannot afford mistakes, Draco, because if you are expelled…

DRACO
I didn’t have anything to do with it, all right?

SNAPE
I hope you are telling the truth, because it was both clumsy and foolish. Already you are suspected of having a hand in it.

DRACO
Who suspects me? For the last time, I didn’t do it, okay?

SNAPE
Ah…Aunt Bellatrix has been teaching you Occlumency, I see. What thoughts are you trying to conceal from your master, Draco?

DRACO
I’m not trying to conceal anything; I just don’t want you butting in!

SNAPE
Listen to me; I am trying to help you. I made the Unbreakable Vow, Draco…

DRACO
Looks like you’ll have to break it then, because I don’t need your protection. I’ve got a plan and it’s going to work!

SNAPE
What is your plan?

DRACO
It’s none of your business!

SNAPE
Draco I can assist you…

DRACO
I’ve got all the assitance I need thanks, I’m not alone!

SNAPE
You were certainly alone tonight…

DRACO
I would’ve had Crabbe and Goyle if you hadn’t put them in detention!

SNAPE
If your friends intend to pass their Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L…

DRACO
What does it matter? It’s all a joke, an act. Like any of us need protecting against the Dark Arts…

SNAPE
It is an act that is crucial to success Draco! Confide in me and I can…

DRACO
I know what you’re up to! You want to steal my glory!

SNAPE
You are speaking like a child! I quite understand that your fathers capture and imprisonment has upset you, but…

Draco walks away immediately from Snape. Harry stands very still as he walks by. We see a shot of Snape watching Draco walk away and he returns back to the direction the party. We see a look of shock on Harry’s face and the scene fades…


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  #75  
Old December 21st, 2007, 5:17 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post


Oh come on! It isn't as cheesy as 'I love magic' is it?!?! lol Well what's a Harry Potter film without a little cheese huh?
Actually I don't mind 'I love magic tooooooo much. But that line was photograph cheese.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
Thanks for the UK reference because I honestly have no idea (Like Kloves huh? )
I've often wondered which edition Kloves/Goldenberg adapts from. If it is the US, then (I think that's enough)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
INT-CLASSROOM-NIGHT (MOMENTS LATER)

Harry walks into the classroom where Hermione is sitting alone. She has a small ring of yellow birds circling her head.

HARRY
Hermione?

HERMIONE
Oh, hello Harry. I was just practicing.

HARRY
They’re really good.

HERMIONE
Thanks…

HARRY
Are you alright?

Before she could answer the door opens and Ron and Lavender run in holding hands and laughing.

RON
Oh….

LAVENDER
Oops

She laughs, kisses Ron, and walks out of the room.

There is an awkward silence for a second.

RON
Hi, Harry! Wondered where you’d got to!

Hermione stands up and the birds are still circling her head.

HERMIONE
You shouldn’t leave Lavender waiting outside.

(She walks slowly towards the door. Harry and Ron both look at each other. Hermione stops at the entrance of the door and turns around.)

Oppugno!!!

She points her wand at Ron and the birds all sped towards Ron and start pecking and clawing at him. He starts to scream and try and get them out of his face. She smiles a little and walks out of them room.
This scene just goes too fast for my liking....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
INT-THE GREAT HALL-DAY

Ron and Harry are sitting in the Great Hall. Harry is reading a book. While Ron is talking its clear that Harry is ignoring him.

RON
She can’t complain she snogged Krum. I never promised Hermione anything. I mean, alright, I was going to go to Slughorns Christmas party with her, but just as friends…I’m a free agent.

INT-GREAT HALL-LATER THAT DAY

The camera pans over and now it’s just Harry and Hermione sitting in the Great Hall. He’s reading his Advanced Potions book.

HERMIONE
He’s at perfect liberty to kiss whomever he likes! I really couldn’t care less.

She starts to write something furiously on the parchment in front of her.
I LOVE this (though might have tweaked it a bit. I know, I'm harsh)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
Now Ron and Harry are sitting in the Great Hall eating dinner and Hermione comes over and throws a pie in Rons face and storms off.
Since When did Hermione go to clown school????

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
The scene cuts again to Harry and Hermione walking down the hallways of Hogwarts.

HERMIONE
Harry, you need to be careful.

HARRY
I’m not giving the book back Hermione.

HERMIONE
I’m not talking about your stupid so-called Prince Harry. I went into the girl’s bathroom just before I came in here and I overheard Romilda Vane talking to some of her friends. They’re all hoping you’re going to take them to Slughorn’s party, and they all seem to have bought Fred and George’s love potions.. I’d just invite someone to go with if I was you.

HARRY
There isn’t anyone I want to invite.

HERMIONE
Well just be careful what you drink.
This scene just comes out of nowhere.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
HERMIONE
Pathetic what some girls would do for a boy. Oh well I’m off to do more things to make Ron jealous.

As she walks away Harry casts an “I don’t think I’ll ever understand girls” look
Say CHEESE

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
INT-BRIDGE-MIDDAY

The scene cuts to shot of Hogwarts covered in snow. Harry standing outside on the bridge with Hedwig and we see him looking at Ginny and Dean playing in the snow together.

HARRY
Am I being pathetic Hedwig, I mean she’s my best friends sister. How do you think Ron would react?
(Hedwig hoots)
Yeah you’re right…I mean she’s like a little sister, but there seems to be something…more.
(Hedwig hoots and Luna walks up next to him.)

LUNA
Hiya Harry!
How Luna comes in makes it look to the audience like its going to end up Luna/Harry.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
INT-THE GREAT HALL-EVENING

The scene cuts to them in the Great Hall where there are Christmas decorations set up and a few elves singing Christmas songs.
Four letters: S P E W !!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
HERMIONE
I like really good Quidditch players.
(Ron frowns and furiously starts to eat his food)
Well I’m off to the library.
(She walks off and we see her smile and the scene cuts to…
I think the library part ruined this line. It's an awesome line and it needs to be used fully.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
CORMAC
Hermione!
(Harry stares at him.)
I mean have you seen her?
Do you want some more cheese?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
TRELAWNY
So dear, tell me more about this Rotfang Conspiracy…


Quote:
INT-HALLLWAY-NIGHT (MOMENTS LATER)

Harry walks out of the room into the dark quite corridor. He pulls out his Invisibility Cloak and throws it over himself. He then walks slowly down the hall and turns to corner and see’s Snape and Draco standing there.

SNAPE
You cannot afford mistakes, Draco, because if you are expelled…

DRACO
I didn’t have anything to do with it, all right?

SNAPE
I hope you are telling the truth, because it was both clumsy and foolish. Already you are suspected of having a hand in it.

DRACO
Who suspects me? For the last time, I didn’t do it, okay?

SNAPE
Ah…Aunt Bellatrix has been teaching you Occlumency, I see. What thoughts are you trying to conceal from your master, Draco?

DRACO
I’m not trying to conceal anything; I just don’t want you butting in!

SNAPE
Listen to me; I am trying to help you. I made the Unbreakable Vow, Draco…

DRACO
Looks like you’ll have to break it then, because I don’t need your protection. I’ve got a plan and it’s going to work!

SNAPE
What is your plan?

DRACO
It’s none of your business!

SNAPE
Draco I can assist you…

DRACO
I’ve got all the assitance I need thanks, I’m not alone!

SNAPE
You were certainly alone tonight…

DRACO
I would’ve had Crabbe and Goyle if you hadn’t put them in detention!

SNAPE
If your friends intend to pass their Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L…

DRACO
What does it matter? It’s all a joke, an act. Like any of us need protecting against the Dark Arts…

SNAPE
It is an act that is crucial to success Draco! Confide in me and I can…

DRACO
I know what you’re up to! You want to steal my glory!

SNAPE
You are speaking like a child! I quite understand that your fathers capture and imprisonment has upset you, but…

Draco walks away immediately from Snape. Harry stands very still as he walks by. We see a shot of Snape watching Draco walk away and he returns back to the direction the party. We see a look of shock on Harry’s face and the scene fades…
I really don't have any problems with this...

The above is probably a bit too negative. Sorry. Can I just say I'm really happy that someone else is participating in this thread and it is great to see other peoples work.


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  #76  
Old December 21st, 2007, 6:30 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Quote:
Originally Posted by ArryGrotter View Post
Actually I don't mind 'I love magic tooooooo much. But that line was photograph cheese.
Oh come onnnnnnn...mice are running all over the I love magic line

Quote:
This scene just goes too fast for my liking....
Yeah it is kind of quick isn't it? I should so do a rewrite now that OOTP is out and maybe we both can come up with the ultimate HBP script....but not to much...can't outwrite Kloves can we? lol

Quote:
I LOVE this (though might have tweaked it a bit. I know, I'm harsh)
YAY you like something!!!

And no worries you're not harsh trust me. It's your opinion and the reason this thread is here is for other fans opinions on your work. I'm glad you're so honest, keep it up! (Just don't make me cry...)

Quote:
Since When did Hermione go to clown school????
I remember when I wrote that. I'd come up with this whole 'Ron/Hermione' montage thing where they're both kinda arguing and Harry is ignoring them both (Kinda what you've read so far) and Ron teases Hermione just like in the book but I couldn't find anything that Hermione could really get Ron back with.

Oooohhhh you know what I just thought? Maybe I could come up with something that has spiders involved?

Quote:
This scene just comes out of nowhere.
IT was supposed to be the 'after the montage' scene. You know fades from Hermione's final assault on Ron to Harry and Hermione walking and just talking like nothing is happening.

Quote:
Say CHEESE
LOL I actually quite liked that line actually What can I say? I love me some cheese!

Quote:
How Luna comes in makes it look to the audience like its going to end up Luna/Harry.
You think so? I never got that...hmmmm. THat's why I added him looking at Ginny and talking to Hedwig about her. How does it make them think that in your opinion?

Quote:
Four letters: S P E W !!!
Actually I wanted so bad to add like a little S.P.E.W. reference in my script...just as a nod to the book fans. After Harry sends Kreacher and Dobby off I was going to have Hermione get frustrated with it and say something about how she should start up a club to liberate house elves and name it S.P.E.W. and Ron and Harry would kinda look at her and they all would say "Nah that would never work."

Quote:
I think the library part ruined this line. It's an awesome line and it needs to be used fully.
Yeah? Hermione's always saying that though...what do u suggest I do? Just have her leave or something?

Quote:
Do you want some more cheese?
Yes please!

Quote:
I was SO hoping you'd laugh at that. I chuckle everytime I read that.

Quote:
I really don't have any problems with this...

The above is probably a bit too negative. Sorry. Can I just say I'm really happy that someone else is participating in this thread and it is great to see other peoples work.
Cool...and like I said no worries I don't see your comments as negative at all actually. Constructive criticism my friend...works wonders...Kloves needs someone to do that for him

And no problems I like this thread because you're really the only other person, besides myself, that has read this script and I'm SO happy to hear what someone else thinks.


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  #77  
Old December 21st, 2007, 6:52 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
You think so? I never got that...hmmmm. That's why I added him looking at Ginny and talking to Hedwig about her. How does it make them think that in your opinion?
I'll just find the scene to figure out...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
INT-BRIDGE-MIDDAY

The scene cuts to shot of Hogwarts covered in snow. Harry standing outside on the bridge with Hedwig and we see him looking at Ginny and Dean playing in the snow together.

HARRY
Am I being pathetic Hedwig, I mean she’s my best friends sister. How do you think Ron would react?
(Hedwig hoots)
Yeah you’re right…I mean she’s like a little sister, but there seems to be something…more.
(Hedwig hoots and Luna walks up next to him.)

LUNA
Hiya Harry!
I think I've figured it out...

"There seems to be something more..." (Luna skips dreamily into veiw)

Also think of the many times the bridge scene in GoF of Harry and Hermione has been bash because it can perceive a H/Hr relationship.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
Actually I wanted so bad to add like a little S.P.E.W. reference in my script...just as a nod to the book fans. After Harry sends Kreacher and Dobby off I was going to have Hermione get frustrated with it and say something about how she should start up a club to liberate house elves and name it S.P.E.W. and Ron and Harry would kinda look at her and they all would say "Nah that would never work."
I think you misinterpreted what I meant...
I just didn't like those elfs singing... They shoud be paid overtime for that!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
Yeah? Hermione's always saying that though...what do u suggest I do? Just have her leave or something?
It just ruined the line for me... I know it's Hermione at but - ....... Hermione ISN'T Hermione then! She's scheming!Hermione, so saying she's going to the library reverts her back to Normal!Hermione. I'd just have her leave (Perhaps glancing at Ron).

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
Cool...and like I said no worries I don't see your comments as negative at all actually. Constructive criticism my friend...works wonders...Kloves needs someone to do that for him

And no problems I like this thread because you're really the only other person, besides myself, that has read this script and I'm SO happy to hear what someone else thinks.
OK.


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  #78  
Old December 21st, 2007, 7:03 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Quote:
Originally Posted by ArryGrotter View Post
I think I've figured it out...

"There seems to be something more..." (Luna skips dreamily into veiw)

Also think of the many times the bridge scene in GoF of Harry and Hermione has been bash because it can perceive a H/Hr relationship.
Ooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhh gotcha

Quote:
I think you misinterpreted what I meant...
I just didn't like those elfs singing... They shoud be paid overtime for that
Nah it's just when you said that I wanted to share an idea I had lol

But no overpay for the elves darn it! Fine..I'll have the frogs from POA sing it then

Quote:
It just ruined the line for me... I know it's Hermione at but - ....... Hermione ISN'T Hermione then! She's scheming!Hermione, so saying she's going to the library reverts her back to Normal!Hermione. I'd just have her leave (Perhaps glancing at Ron).
Ah I see what you mean.

Quote:
OK.
You didn't have to yell

kidding


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  #79  
Old December 21st, 2007, 7:20 am
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

After that lengthly dicussion of the Party.....

I did this in the last week. It is horrible. I don't know how to fix it, but Iwant to keep it....

PS: Platform 9 3/4 (It's a terrible mess)INT. KITCHEN - 4 PRIVET DRIVE - EVENING
(A LITTLE LATER) (31/8/1991)

Vernon, Petunia and Dudley are watching TV. Harry enters cautiously. Dudley scurries from the room at the sight of him, pig tail still noticeable.

HARRY POTTER
Er - Uncle Vernon?

Vernon grunts, still watching TV.

HARRY POTTER (CONT’D)
Er - I need to be at King's Cross tomorrow to - to go to Hogwarts.

Vernon grunts again.

HARRY POTTER (CONT’D)
Would it be all right if you gave me a lift?

Grunt again.

HARRY POTTER (CONT’D)
Er - Thank you.

Harry turns to leave, but...

VERNON DURSLEY
Funny way to get to a wizards' school, the train. Magic carpets all got punctures, have they?

Harry simply turns back.

VERNON DURSLEY (CONT’D)
Where is this school, anyway?

HARRY POTTER
(Suddenly realizing the answer)
I don't know.

Harry pulls out his ticket and reads it.

HARRY POTTER (CONT’D)
I just take the train from platform nine and three-quarters at eleven o'clock.

VERNON DURSLEY
Don't talk rubbish. There is no platform nine and three-quarters.

HARRY POTTER
It's on my ticket.

VERNON DURSLEY
Barking, howling mad, the lot of them. You just wait. All right, we'll take you to King's Cross. We're going up to London tomorrow anyway. Got to have Dudley’s ruddy tail removed.

INT. KING’S CROSS STATION - LATE MORNING
(1/9/1991)

On one platform is a big plastic ‘9’ and on the platform next to it is a big plastic ‘10’. Vernon smiles evilly.

VERNON DURSLEY
Well, there you are, boy. Platform nine - platform ten. Your platform should be somewhere in the middle, but they don't seem to have built it yet.

The Dursley’s depart.

VERNON DURSLEY (CONT’D)
Have a good term.

Vernon and Dudley start laughing at once. Petunia on the other hand, looks at the barrier between the two platforms for a few seconds then begins to laugh like her husband and son.

Harry is alone with a trolley carrying his trunk and his pet owl, Hedwig. Just when he begins to become worried, he hears a voice.

MOLLY WEASLEY
...packed with Muggles of course...

Harry miraculously sees a woman (MOLLY WEASLEY) and her 10-year-old daughter (GINNY WEASLEY) followed by four boys (RON WEASLEY, FRED WEASLEY, GEORGE WEASLEY and PERCY WEASLEY), each pushing a trunk like Harry and the eldest (Percy) also storing an owl. Ginny points to a solid brick wall.

GINNY WEASLEY
Platform nine and three-quarters! Mum, can't I go...

MOLLY WEASLEY
You're not old enough, Ginny, now be quiet. All right, Percy, you go first.

Percy comes forward, making his way to the solid brick wall between platforms 9 and 10. A group of tourists come passed blocking Harry’s view. When they leave, Percy has vanished.

MOLLY WEASLEY (CONT’D)
Fred, George, you next.

He and his twin, George, run towards the wall ... and disappear.

HARRY POTTER
Excuse me.

Molly turns to Harry.

MOLLY WEASLEY
Hello, dear. First time at Hogwarts? Ron's new, too.

She points to the last and youngest of her sons.

HARRY POTTER
Yes. The thing is - I don't know how to -

He points to the brick wall.

MOLLY WEASLEY
Not to worry. All you have to do is walk straight at the barrier between platforms nine and ten. Best do it at a bit of a run if you're nervous. Go on, go now before Ron.

HARRY POTTER
Er - okay.

Harry starts to push his trolley forward and gulps. Closer and closer the brick wall comes. Then...

INT. PLATFORM NINE AND THREE QUARTERS - LATE MORNING
(1/9/1991)

...he falls through, and he finds himself on a platform packed with people.
‘Hogwarts Express, eleven o’clock’ reads a sign overhead. Behind him is an archway, the words ‘Platform Nine and Three-Quarters’ etched into it.
Taking his trunk, Harry passes owls, cats and wizards, trying find an empty compartment.

NEVILLE LONGBOTTOM
Gran, I've lost my toad again.

AUGUSTA LONGBOTTOM
Oh, Neville.

Harry finds an empty carriage and tries to lift through the carriage door. It drops onto his foot.

GEORGE WEASLEY
Want a hand?

Fred and George Weasley spot Harry’s trouble.

HARRY POTTER
Yes, please.

Together the three of them...

INT. HOGWARTS EXPRESS COMPARTMENT - LATE MORNING
(1/9/1991)

...get the trunk into Harry’s compartment. Subconsciously, Harry sweeps his hair of his forehead with his hand, revealing the scar on his forehead.

FRED WEASLEY
What’s that?

GEORGE WEASLEY
Blimey, are you?

FRED WEASLEY
He is. Aren’t you?

HARRY POTTER
What?

FRED WEASLEY / GEORGE WEASLEY
Harry Potter!

HARRY POTTER
Oh - Yes - I am.

They both stare at Harry.

MOLLY WEASLEY (O.S.)
Fred? George? Are you there?

FRED WEASLEY / GEORGE WEASLEY
Coming, Mum.

With one last look at Harry, the twins leave.

Harry positions himself so he can see what is happening down at the station.

MOLLY WEASLEY (O.S.)
Ron, you've got something on your nose.

INT. PLATFORM NINE AND THREE QUARTERS - LATE MORNING
(CONTINUOUS ACTION) (1/9/1991)

Ron jerks away as Molly rubs the end of his nose with her handkerchief.

MOLLY WEASLEY
Where's Percy?

FRED WEASLEY
He's coming now.

Percy strides forward, already wearing his Hogwarts robes, a red and gold badge with the letter ‘P’ pinned to it.

PERCY WEASLEY
Can't stay long, Mother. I'm up front with the prefects.
GEORGE WEASLEY

(Sarcastically)
Oh, are you a prefect, Percy? You should have said something.

FRED WEASLEY
Hang on, I think I remember him saying something. Once -

GEORGE WEASLEY
Or twice -

FRED WEASLEY
A minute -

GEORGE WEASLEY
All summer -

PERCY WEASLEY
Oh, shut up.

MOLLY WEASLEY
(To Percy)
Well, have a good term and send me an owl when you get there.

She kisses him on the cheek and he departs. She then turns on the twins.

MOLLY WEASLEY (CONT’D)
Now, you two. If I get one more owl telling me you've - you've blown up a toilet or -

FRED WEASLEY
Blown up a toilet? We've never blown up a toilet.

GEORGE WEASLEY
Great idea though, Mum.

MOLLY WEASLEY
It's not funny. And look after Ron.

FRED WEASLEY
Don't worry, ickle Ronniekins is safe with us.

RON WEASLEY
Shut up.

GEORGE WEASLEY
Hey Mum, guess what!

INT. HOGWARTS EXPRESS COMPARTMENT - LATE MORNING
(CONTINUOUS ACTION) (1/9/1991)

Harry leans back so they can’t notice him looking.

GEORGE WEASLEY (O.S.)
Guess who we just met on the train?

INT. PLATFORM NINE AND THREE QUARTERS - LATE MORNING
(CONTINUOUS ACTION) (1/9/1991)

FRED WEASLEY
You know that black-haired boy who was near us in the station? Know who he is?

MOLLY WEASLEY
Who?

FRED WEASLEY
Harry Potter!

Ginny suddenly becomes excited.

GINNY WEASLEY
Oh, Mum, can I go on the train and see him, Mum, oh please...

MOLLY WEASLEY
You've already seen him, Ginny, and the poor boy isn't something you goggle at in a zoo. Is he really, Fred? How do you know?

FRED WEASLEY
Asked him. Saw his scar. It's really there - like lightning.

MOLLY WEASLEY
Poor dear - no wonder he was alone.

FRED WEASLEY
Do you think he remembers what You-Know-Who looks like?

MOLLY WEASLEY
I forbid you to ask him, Fred. As though he needs reminding of that on his first day at school.

FRED WEASLEY
All right, keep your hair on.

A whistle sounds. Molly kisses each of them. Ginny starts to cry.

FRED WEASLEY (CONT’D)
Don't, Ginny, we'll send you loads of owls.

GEORGE WEASLEY
We'll send you a Hogwarts toilet seat.

MOLLY WEASLEY
George!

GEORGE WEASLEY
Only joking, Mum.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
Nah it's just when you said that I wanted to share an idea I had lol

But no overpay for the elves darn it! Fine..I'll have the frogs from POA sing it then
Those frogs will be out of work, so the first step would be to script them....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozenone View Post
You didn't have to yell

kidding
Is 'ok' better???



Last edited by ArryGrotter; December 21st, 2007 at 7:25 am.
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  #80  
Old December 21st, 2007, 7:31 am
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Phrozenone  Male.gif Phrozenone is offline
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Re: Fan Scripts: Script your own version of Harry Potter

Ok.....first things first. Did you REALLY need to have Harry go back to the Dursley's to ask for a ride? You are really packing it on thick if you want this is to be 130 buddy.

That's alot of talking involved on the Weasley's part aswell. I chuckled at the whole 'toilet' thing though. I'd forgetten about that line (I haven't read the 1st book in a WHILE!!) You really are trying your best to stick to cannon though I'll give you that.


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